I want to GO HOME

I’m frustrated today. I’m tired of hospitals and medicine and alarms and wires. I’m tired of doctors and nurses (no offense to my medical pals)… I have a baby who is FINE. She is FINE and I want to bring her home.
Ugh. Near tears here. I’m just tired.

We may be getting out this week. On a monitor, of course. I just sold my soul… that is, I am allowing the staff to bottle feed her twice, overnight… it’s still my milk and it’s the fastest way to get her out.
They are saying that breastmilk doesn’t have enough calcium and iron for preemies, so they have to add formula to my milk for those 2 bottles. I have a hard time believing that. But I will nod and smile, because once she comes home, I don’t have to give her any bottles if I don’t want to. And I sure as heck will not be adding formula at home. Sheesh.

Anyway. I’m mad and not very spiritual, and I probably have rebellion. But COME ON! Give me my baby already.

Disclaimer: I am so so grateful for all the medical personnel and everything they have done for Brynn. They have been a HUGE blessing. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. I’m just done, that’s all.

16 thoughts on “I want to GO HOME

  1. I have just forwarded this information to your doctors. Har…har… (I no, bad joke)I can hear your heart too.The Lord can hear your heart also. It’s things like this that make me think about God being SO near we we’re hurting.

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  2. Just saw my first post this AM was chopped with errors.Beth- Awesome for Issac! I’m sure it’s exciting for everyone! Keith seems pretty close himself.

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  3. i BET brynn is getting OUT!!!!is THAT the big news???i remember not liking the medical personnel after I birthed jeremiahjohn….first of all, i slapped the doctor when he placed a cold stethoscope on my cramping c-sectioned belly….second, i hated the roommate i had and envisioned myself throwing the corded gargantuon 1987-style telephone OVER the divider curtain in the room because she talked on the phone non-stop, crunched ice, and boasted about her free shrimp dinner because she had paid her bill in full prior to the delivery of her baby…third, that same doctor refused to talk to me about my anger and pain, but sent the physician’s assistant back into the room (he walked out after i slapped him) to tell me that they would soon put me into a private room because i needed to rest….fourth – that same night, the REFUSED to bring my baby to me so that i could feed him…told me i needed rest…. and all night long i just KNEW THAT they had locked me into my room….and that they had switched my baby for someone elses…and that my baby would end up on KNOTS LANDING in one of those families….! it was horrible!!!fifthly – the nurses REFUSED to keep my baby on breast milk only and kept giving him bottles of water, and or formula… I was so mad! i think that was all the complaints i had about medical personnel back in 1987…i’ll have to review my memory bank to tell other stories at another time…God made babies… God made breastmilk…. God made mamas… and Mama’s KNOW BEST!!!!!!!!!!ok, i’m done

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  4. MPC…lol!! Love the gargantuan phone toss. Mama’s DO know best.Jess..you’re doing an AWESOME job! You didn’t sell your soul…do what you gotta to get that baby home! But — I agree — they are totally misinformed. Ugh…it really chaps my hide. Yep.

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  5. okI’m first to wait for the BIG news!hospitals and schools have this uncanny ability to make you feel like you’re institutionalized….a prisoner of the “system” only in theory; not in reality….

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