Sometimes, in the morning when I am especially boring, I think, “I will wait until something interesting happens and then blog about that.” Often, when I do this, either a)nothing comes to mind or b) something interesting takes up the whole afternoon.
Yesterday, we planned on the MOG leaving on a jet plane around 5:30. So that was ideal because we could have a normal day and R2 would get home from school and we’d all leave together and have dinner and drop Daddy off at the A-port. As is the case with all seamless plans, it didn’t happen.
I have driven this route a lot, and the key is, stay on 71. Even when there are no signs and 3 freeways. Just stay the course. So I missed one exit, to stay on, and ended up in the ghetto. I live in the ghetto, but this was a different one. So I’m all like, hey, I’ll just turn around and get back on. But nooooooo, there’s crazy construction and wavy lanes and confusion. Then I remember, hey! I have a GPS!
Now, maybe you’re like, uh, why didn’t you already have that on? I’ll tell you. My GPS is a TomTom. I got it for Christmas. By January we had figured out it’s a little hit-and-miss. So I keep it in my diaper bag, and if I have already mapped out a route on Google Maps, and have the basic idea, then I can type the address in my GPS and follow it pretty closely, except when it deviates from what I KNOW to be the truth. So then I take off on my own, and C3PO (my GPS voice) repeatedly cries out, “Oh dear, Master! Turn around as soon as possible!” over and over and I get so annoyed I just turn the thing off and put it in my bag again.
So anyways. I got it out yesterday and told it to take me home. It led me through all the streets in the ghetto, like a tour with Paula Abdul. Oh, and the other thing it does is say, “Turn left now.” and it means like, immediately NOW. So I have to yank the wheel and coffee is spilling and the children are yelling don’t drive crazy mommy and so on.
Anyways. I am shooting along on the course it has for me, way, way that way over there, and I rocket past a sign for 71 S. (sigh) So I ignore C3PO and turn around in a scary, scary parking lot and get back to that sign. C3PO gets on board and tells me to take the next left, so I do. Only my robotic buddy actually meant the left after that. U-turn again, and finally get on 71. I start getting the warning beep that I am exceeding the speed limit. I depress the power button. I no longer need assistance. On one hand, I am grateful to Tom and Tom for actually getting me out of that neighborhood. On the other hand, I wonder where he was taking me. Is there a kidnapping plot? I guess I won’t know until I get lost again, next week when I am going downtown.
I make it home a long time later. I want Apple to make a stand-alone GPS device. It would work.