I have had the unmitigated gall to go and get sick. I know, I’m a nervy little broad. Now, before you buy your one-way plane tickets, Mama and Eva, I am not pregnant. Yes, I’m sure.
I am sick, though. I have some kinda flu that comes and goes… but for three days or so I have felt sick and achy and miserable… the problem is, I am the mama.
There is a bat-signal of sorts that goes out to toddler types when Mama gets sick. “Act bad!” it says, across the sky. “Act very, very bad! Maybe even draw blood!”
Toddlers house-wide receive the missive and comply like good little heathens.
“Steal the brownies out of Mama’s room, and share them with your sister, and spread them as far as you can, in your mom’s bed, and then in your bed and your sister’s crib and all the way down the hall! More crumbs!”
“Nap? What’s a nap? You aren’t even sleepy! You should bite each other and scream instead!”
“You can’t just eat that- you have to fall down screaming about how you NEVER EVER want pizza ever again first for a while. Okay, now eat it cheerfully.”
and so…… on….
I had a meltdown today and tried to go to a hotel to take a nap. Couldn’t find the keys, and besides, I wasn’t really going to a hotel.
After I took out an ad and had it published on his forehead, the MOG figured out that maybe I needed help with HIS children, since I was having a psychotic break. I don’t know exactly what happened, but I slept for over an hour, so whatever.