Toby is FOUR

Today is Toby’s 4th birthday. 4 years ago, when they put him in my arms, it was like a sharp ridge of light just broke through the grief and the fog of losing the twins, and of R2’s birth and trials. I did not believe Toby was real until he was in my arms.

I have walked a fine line since that day, holding him as close as possible while trying to let him practice flying. As I write this, he is jumping from the hotel couch onto the bed, and then back.
I live in a perpetual state of terror that he is going to grow up all of the sudden and I will have missed something, a moment, or a day.
I was so aware yesterday that it was his last day of 3. We ate at Cici’s and drove all day and I watched him with a lump in my throat.
Now he is 4, and 3 is over forever. It was such a good year. I know 4 will be, too, but even as I celebrate him growing and learning, I miss my 4 pound baby.

4 thoughts on “Toby is FOUR

  1. yippeeee!!!!!! Happy Birthday Tody!!!!


  2. BethC says:

    "When something can be read without effort, great effort has gone into its writing." – Enrique Jardiel Poncelathanks for sharing


  3. CrystalD says:

    i feel your pain… as isaac just turned 4… I'm very much enjoying the fact that he is staying much more baby like than Merci did!


  4. Josh says:

    Happy Birthday Toby!! Hard to believe Keith is just less than four months away from being four also. Wow!


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