Early reports from the scene of the crime were conclusive: Toby pushed Brynn off the bunkbed. He protested his innocence, claiming a setup, but in the heat of the moment, there was no time for a thorough investigation. The MOG and I had been out, and our attractive single EMT friend Liz was babysitting. Somehow, maybe by the hand of God, many of our medical emergencies have happened in Liz’s presence. Or maybe she’s cursed. Time will tell. Anyway, when we got home Brynn was asleep on the couch, after having fallen, and so we moved her back to her bed and Drama ensued. This time, though, we could tell the drama was a little more legit. More trauma than drama, this.
We all decided her collarbone was probably broken, but that it would be okay to sleep on it, since they don’t do anything with broken collarbones anyway, and she was so very tired. The MOG and I retired, planning to ground Toby from everything in the world once he woke up.
In the light of day, though, a different tale was told. Evidently, Toby was a log, and Brynn was Luigi, jumping OVER the log as it rolled. On the top bunk. The final jump over Mario or the log or whatever was the one that sent her headfirst to the floor. It took me 24 hours before I started doing what-ifs, with all the nightmare scenarios that could have occurred.
I took her to the ER, where she flirted and charmed everyone to the end of the world, and it was determined that her clavicle, or collarbone is indeed broken. They gave her a sling and some Motrin and sent us on her way, and the doctor leaned down into her face and said, “No more monkeys jumping on the bed!”, which I thought was an appropriate literary reference, but it hurt Brynn’s feelings, so we went and had some donuts, which we got for free because she told the donut guy the whole Mario/Luigi story and it doesn’t get any cuter than her.
She’s pretty confused about what exactly is broken. She has a sling, so she just tells everyone her arm is broken, but then she uses her lower arm anyway, which has to concern people. Her mobility is limited, mainly when it comes to taking a bath or cleaning her room, because, her “loverbone” is broken, and also her “wonderbone”, and her “collar”. Everyone is commited to babying her, though, except Tristan who sees her a sitting duck, fish in a barrel kind of scenario. Today she told me the only thing she thought might help would be some ice cream. Skills, this one.
They expect it to heal well, although we have to follow up with orthopedics. In the end, I’m very grateful for my sweet little girl with just the broken collar.